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I can hardly believe that in just nine days I will be moving into college one last time. For some students, this moment is bittersweet. Decorating a house, apartment, or dorm one last time with best friends you have made over the years. But, for others, like incoming freshmen, it can be extremely nerve-wracking to move away from home for the first time.
Students will be meeting new friends, meeting new roommates, and adjusting to a new college schedule for the first time. Though this adjustment can take some time, I am hoping that this blog will help you find the confidence you need to move in and adjust to living with roommates.
When moving into college, it is important to note that every student is feeling a range of emotions. Some may be excited to start a new chapter of their life away from home. Some may be nervous to meet new people or explore a new area. In this week’s blog, I will be sharing some tips on how to live with roommates in order to help you acclimate to a new lifestyle. Learning how to share space, take care of yourself, and speak up when things get messy are all important skills to manage when living with others.
So, follow along because as I said, move-in day is just nine days away!
Tip 1: Respect Your Space and Others
One of the reasons why my roommates and I get along so well is that we each respect our own and each others’ spaces. After a few years of living together, we have a better understanding of one another, and that we each have our own way of calming down, studying, and mingling.
When we first begin studying, each of us likes to do our homework or study in separate rooms. Staying focused and completing assignments is a top priority in our house, therefore, alone time is important. Then, after a few hours of studying solo, we all gather in the living room or the kitchen table to study again – but this time, in the presence of one another.
It is important to have respect for your own space to help eliminate your frustration with the others who are living with you. Something that works for our group is to write out everyone’s schedule on a piece of paper, or calendar, to see how busy we are. This determines who will be in their own space studying later than usual or who would be willing to start dinner for the group. Because we share this schedule, it helps us understand each other better. Last year, my Tuesdays and Thursdays were extremely busy. When I got home from a long day of classes, I needed time to unwind but also complete homework for the following day. My roommates understood this and gave me the space I needed to be productive in the house.
Tip From a Roommate, Carly: “It is okay to want to be alone and say no in order to wind down after a busy day. Sometimes having some downtime for self-care is better than forcing yourself to do something you don’t really want to do. It is okay to ask for space too! College can be a whirlwind of plans and business but at the end of the day you must protect your peace!”
As Carly said, protecting your peace is important while respecting your space and others. But, now that you are on your own and away from home, things can get messy pretty quickly. With a busy schedule and the need for sleep, your room, kitchen, and bathroom may look like a tornado ran through it.
I have found that creating a schedule for myself is one of the best ways to stay on track with cleaning. Every Sunday is a reset day. I like to vacuum my room, make sure my school books are off the kitchen counter, fold extra blankets that are lying around, and simply clean up what is mine. This is a great way to prepare yourself for the week while staying organized and helping your roommates stay clean as well. This also shows respect around the house by keeping your area and others clean.
Living with roommates can be overwhelming at times. But, respecting your own space by cleaning and using it as a safe space to work will help you respect your peace and others as well.
Tip 2: Say Yes!
In one of my previous blogs I wrote while studying abroad, saying “yes” is one of my big tips for being more spontaneous in life and exploring out of your comfort zone. When living with roommates, saying “yes” is a great way to get to know one another and explore both local and collegiate events and the area surrounding URI.
In the previous years of living with my roommates, going outside for walks around the neighborhood was a great way to communicate, connect, relieve stress, and simply spend quality time together.
Tip From a Roommate, Olivia: “Getting outside and being able to explore the area near our house and of course the beach, is a great way to strengthen the bond between your roommates. It gets you out of the house, away from the stress of deadlines and schoolwork, and is a way to form new memories with the people you are living with.”
Saying yes to football games, shopping in Newport, local fairs, or even spending a day at the beach will help you strengthen the bond between you and your roommates. In my house, one of our favorite ways to wind down and say “yes” is by making a home-cooked meal followed by strolling to the beach to watch the sun go down with some of our favorite music playing.
In the long run, you won’t remember all the days you sat in classes for hours or the traffic you sat in on Upper College Road. Take it from me, a now senior in college, you will remember the random moments of saying “yes” to a calamari festival, driving at midnight to Camp Cronin, movie marathons on Saturdays, and special moments with roommates who I hope turn out to be in your life for a long time.
Tip 3: Speak Up!
My final tip for students who are moving in for the first time with new roommates or living with people you have known for a while is to never be afraid of speaking up. It is important to make sure your voice is heard.
Throughout the school year, problems are bound to arise. Whether you or others may feel uncomfortable, flustered, and unsure of what to do, my advice for you is to speak up and allow yourself to find a sense of comfort.
You and your roommates are living together for almost eight months out of the year. If you allow a problem to go unresolved, it can slowly deteriorate relationships, energy, and the enjoyment of being at school. Speaking up allows you to express your needs, concerns, and wishes and make the situation come to the forefront of your roommate’s mind instead of putting it off another week.
Many emotions arise from these types of situations. What I have learned throughout years of being in college is that the majority of students have roommate concerns or problems. Whether it be from not cleaning their space to not respecting others, more often than not, students have concerns about their living arrangement. Speaking up about problems may not always go your way but it will provide you with confidence to be able to stand up for yourself and let your roommates know where you stand in any given situation.
Tip from Tara: Other people may have different values than you do. Other people may not want to hear your voice in situations. But, as a human, you have the right to speak up when situations are hurting you personally and affecting the people you live with. So don’t be afraid to speak up. It can be scary at first, but it will lead to an answer that is needed in the long run.
In just nine days, houses, apartments, and dorms will be filled with students who are getting to know one another. I hope that these tips will help ease you into your move in a day and give you the courage and motivation to get to know your roommates.
Thank you so much for reading this week’s blog, and stay tuned for next week where I share some of my favorite college meals.