As I am sitting at my desk in my off-campus house in Narragansett, a place I have been calling home for the past few years, I have recently found myself holding back. I have found myself holding back not only from taking advantage of the place I live but also from choosing to put myself first. 

I have been holding back from paying attention to myself while instead, I have been trying to please the ones around me. With that being said, welcome back to another Note to Self blog! This time, I am not only writing to you but as a reminder to myself: put yourself first. 

I know – it feels like a selfish thing to do. But, I can promise you that from my own experiences within this past year, and now being able to prioritize myself in making decisions, choosing how to spend my weekend, or even what to buy at the grocery store, it is worth it. 

I am a huge goal setter. When a new month rolls around, I have my pen and sticky notes ready to take on a list of goals I want to complete like trying out a new workout class or getting ahead with homework. But, one thing that I have learned is that when it comes to completing these goals, it is essential to put yourself first. 

After studying abroad for five months and not having a set schedule, forcing myself to set goals was one of the ways I was staying on track. But, things began to get complicated. I was constantly pushing my own needs aside to have a successful trip around the world. I was attending all of the events my peers suggested and trying all of the foods that were recommended, but I was not putting my wants or needs at the top of my list. 

If you remember one of my favorite blogs, Note to My Amviert Self, I left one of my favorite tips: say no. By saying no, you are allowing yourself to focus on what you want to do, what you want to accomplish, and what you want to remember most of your time. This does not just apply to studying abroad or traveling, it applies to your regular set of goals. 

Because I love to set new goals each month, I prioritize what I want mentally and what I want to achieve physically. I simply write down goals so I can visualize success in my own mind. One of these goals each month challenges me to find a new way to put myself first. 

While my goals are personal to myself, each individual has their own wants and needs. For me, I enjoy focusing on my well-being and health. Therefore, I find a way to push myself to exercise and try new ways of enjoying a workout. Sometimes this can be daunting because I like to be over-ambitious and try a lot of new things. At first, I would try to convince my friends or family to take on these challenges with me – try a new workout class or run in the hot sun. But, as the weeks went by and my goal was being pushed aside, I realized that I needed to put myself first. If I wanted to try a new workout class, I would go to the workout class. If I wanted to go on a long run in the evening, I would go on that run. 

In addition to putting yourself first to achieve your personal goals, allowing yourself to make your own choices is equally important. As mentioned previously, saying no to others means you say yes to yourself. What I mean by this is that if there is something you have been wanting to do while traveling or sitting at home, do it! Go to that new hiking spot. Try out the best restaurant in town. Enjoy a night by yourself watching the sun go down.

By allowing yourself to say yes to the activities that you always think about and want to do, you are prioritizing yourself. Everyone will always have differing opinions about what sites to see or what places to explore. So, allow yourself to request time to yourself so you are able to do what you want to do and create your own adventure. 

Prioritizing my own wants has been something I have been working on this year and especially this month. Being a senior and living in Rhode Island has allowed me to be spontaneous and see new things. But, as it is my last year, there is still so much more to do. So, as a reminder to you and to myself, it is okay to put yourself first. 

One of the biggest changes I have learned in recent weeks is to not let others hold you back from completing your goals. You are allowed to prioritize yourself. You are allowed to put yourself first. You are allowed to focus on you. 

Thank you for reading this week’s blog. Stay tuned for upcoming blogs. 

 

By Tara Roumes